Tuesday, November 1, 2011

RAW Thoughts for 10/31/2011

An UNHOLY Alliance Is Formed
Rock started the show. He said Cena and him represent a generation. Rock said last week Cena asked him from the heart to be his partner at Survivor Series. Rock gave Cena his answer from the heart, "Hell no." Rock said Cena wanted Team Fruit Loop to team with Team Bring It, and that wasn't going to happen. Rock then mentioned all of his Twitter followers who wanted to see Rock team with Cena. Rock said he also despises Miz and Truth, and Rock will do it for the people. He will team with Cena at Survivor Series. Rock said he will show Cena and all of his fans just what Rock is capable of at Wrestlemania next year. Basic Rock stuff. Nothing new, but Rock delivered in typical Rock fashion. Survey Says: 3.5/5

Ricardo Can Never Catch A Break
It's C.M. Punk vs Mark Henry. If Punk wins he get a WWE Title shot. Punk hit a couple kicks, then a springboard clothesline and Macho Man elbow for two. ADR and Ricardo came to ringside. Del Rio ordered Ricardo to attack Henry, which he did, causing a DQ win for Henry. No Title shot for Punk. After the match Punk attacked both, and threw Ricardo in the ring where he ate a World's Strongest Slam. Neither Punk or Henry was getting pinned, so a relatively smart finish to continue leader. Survey Says: 2.5/5

Justin Roberts introduced The Muppets. Miss Piggy said she was the Original Diva. Vickie and Jack Swagger interrupted. Vickie hated sharing the stage with livestock. Swagger ripped on Kermit. Miss Piggy called him Frankenstein. Kermit told Swagger they didn't want any trouble with him or his mother. Haha. Vickie freaked out as Santino's music hit. Santino said him and Swagger, and Dolph Ziggler and Zack Ryder had a match later. Kelly Kelly then walked out and gave Kermit a kiss, which angered Miss Piggy. That was fun. I always loved the Muppets.

Eve won a Divas costume Battle Royal.

Backstage Beaker had a new energy drink to give to Santino. Christian interrupted. Christian dumped out the drink which horrified Beaker. He said "Better luck next time nerd." Sheamus came in and asked if there was a problem. Christian walked away. Sheamus told Beaker he wouldn't make the Family Reunion this year, but to give Aunt Theresa his best. Sheamus then spiked Beaker's hair. Funny stuff. The one interaction I wanted to happen happened, and they even joked about them being related. Great!

Wade Barrett and Cody Rhodes defeated Air Boom. Could action for the brief time they had. Barrett's Resurrection continues. We can only hope it leads to something. Maybe a Tag Title shot for Rhodes and Barrett in the future. Christian came out and attacked Air Boom after the match, but Sheamus made the save. Looks like a potential Survivor Series match. Sheamus/Air Boom/Zack Ryder/Santino vs Christian/Wade Barrett/Cody Rhodes/Dolph Ziggler/Jack Swagger.

Statler and Waldorf were shown. Waldorf said we've gone from the Stone Cold to someone born in the Stone Age.

Backstage, C.M. Punk asked John Laurinaitis what he was going to do about what happened in his match earlier. Laurinaitis said Punk will get his WWE Title Shot, so long as Alberto del Rio agrees to give him one.

A Brodus Clay promo aired. He re-debuts next week.

Way To Protect Your WWE Champion
I had a write up planned for this match, but then Big Show pinned Del Rio and it just pissed me off. The match was nothing to write home about, but having Show go over ADR clean is just ridiculous. Alberto del Rio is the WWE CHAMPION. I'm so sick of all this stuff about having to protect the Big Show because he has such a mystique. Guess what? He doesn't. I don't even know why he is around on a full time basis anymore. Sure he's a great company guy and great for PR, but it is no reason to put him over the WWE CHAMPION. It kills any momentum Del Rio built, and it is just ridiculous to see it happen. What a waste. Survey Says: 1/5

Afterwards C.M. Punk came out. He told ADR he was going to put him in the Anaconda Vice until ADR agreed to give him a WWE Title match at Survivor Series. ADR finally agreed after a few seconds in the hold.

GONZO and Fozzie were backstage. They talked about how big some of the wrestlers are. Gonzo said he could be a WWE Champion. Dolph Ziggler, Jack Swagger, and Vickie walked in. They pulled Gonzo's arms out and wrapped them around his head. Fozzie said he's happy for his short stubby arms.

Santino was up next against Jack Swagger. Santino won when Beaker gave him the special Muppets drink, which he spit in Swagger's face and then rolled him up for the win. Animal was the time keeper. Only watchable because of the Muppets.

Zack Ryder Only Wins Non-Title Matches! Woo Woo Woo!
Next was Ryder vs Ziggler. Ryder took Ziggler out with some arm drags. Ryder hit a missile drop kick on Ziggler than took him to the outside as we headed to the break. Back from break, Ziggler had Ryder in an arm lock. Ziggler hit an elbow drop. He went for a neckbreaker, but Ryder countered with a catapult into the ring post. Ryder worked over Ziggler with some punches, then a knee to Ziggler in the corner. Ryder hit a knee to the face for 3, but the referee missed Ziggler's foot under the rope. Match continues. Ryder chased Ziggler outside. Vicke grabbed Ryder's leg so Dolph connected with a kick. He went for the Zig Zag but Ryder held onto the rope. Ryder hit the Rough Ryder for the win. OK stuff. Survey Says: 2.5/5

They recapped the Nash/HHH on-goings from last week. HHH is still out 5 weeks. Apparently John Laurinaitis re-signed Kevin Nash, and he will be at RAW next week.

Michael Cole said Jim Ross didn't show up because of some stupid disease. Waldorf said the only thing worse than listening to Michael Cole talk is nothing.

Backstage Miss Piggy was rubbing John Morrison's abs. Miss Piggy asked him to dinner. He said he couldn't but he knew a friend who would. Enter Hornswoggle. Hornswoggle showed Miss Piggy his tattoo of her then gave her a kiss. She punched him in the gut. Kermit asked if Hornswoggle was ok. He left. Kermit said "And I thought our show was weird." Ha. Cody came in and but a bag on Kermit's head.

I Know What John Cena Did Last Summer
Main event time. Cena got the better of Miz early. Miz locked in a chin lock, then hit is corner clothesline. Miz locked in a sleeper hold. Cena back dropped Miz out of the hold. Traditional Cena offense. Miz countered an Attitude Adjustment into a reverse DDT. Miz went for a kick but missed. Cena went for the STF but Miz got out and hit his backbreaker/neckbreaker combo. Miz went for a Skull Crushing Finale, but Cena countered with a clothesline. Miz went for a superplex but Cena fought out. Cena hit his top rope leg drop for two. Miz countered another AA attempt with a DDT. Miz charged at Cena but Cena tossed him over the top and into the barricade. Someone in a Scream mask attacked Cena. Back in the ring, Cena locked in the STF and Miz tapped giving Cena the win. The masked guy came in after, but Cena AA'd him. Of course it was R-Truth. OK Match, happy ending for the fans and viewers. But Cena just took care of both his opponents at Survivor Series single-handily. Why does he need The Rock? Survey Says: 2/5

OVERALL
This was a blah RAW made better by the Muppets. Some decent wrestling, but all of the Muppets stuff was good to great, especially Statler and Waldorf as well as the Sheamus/Beaker interaction. The Rock was typical Rock. He was good but didn't bring anything new to the table. But there were also two booking decisions I hated on the show. One was Alberto del Rio losing clean to the Big Show. Stupid. I already ranted about that. The other was Cena taking out Miz and R-Truth. That essentially amde Miz and Truth look second fiddle to Cena, and of course nothing compared to The Rock. WWE has a lot of work to do to make Miz and Truth look like threats in time for the PPV. I'm giving this RAW a 5, mostly for The Muppets and the decent in ring action for the night.

NFL Review tomorrow.

And remember kids, the Muppets are everyone's friends. But don't mistake Gonzo for HHH, because Gonzo would never sleep with the boss's daughter.

Until next time,
Justin C
Follow Me on Twitter @JCWonka

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